It’s a long time that I have not done an update about my eating disorders, today it is.
I did not talk about my eating disorders since a lot for the simple reason that I progressed a lot and I feel more comfortable about food thereby I did not want to talk about it. But these last time, I did again few progress and at this moment I wanted to check this and write a post about. I did a really lot of progress but all is far to be won. I have again few problems with food and to deal with.
I have tried a few lot of new food, with some I feel comfortable, other not. These last months, I really tried new things, currently and since the beginning of summer, I decided to take a break in my food goals. The fact that I tested a lot of things in the past months, I needed it and take a break. That gives me good, I’m ready to be back to my goals in September in force. During summer, I have chosen and pick up few food to try like even in function of my desires.
My relationship with the food can to be different from one month to another, one month I can feel myself good and another I can do a relapse, it’s in function of my moods and feelings on the rest of my life.
ABOUT MY SITUATION.
I feel less disgust about a lot of food, all it’s not good but a new thing in my life, it’s that even if I can’t eat a food by disgust, I can maybe smell it and loved the smell. In these past months, the foods where I did the more of progress about my disgust at the point to be able to eat them it’s the meat and the yogourts. I can’t eat all form of meat, generally I can just eat ground meat or steak in a hamburger. It’s already a big deal because before I could not eat meat even like that. I did a big deal with yogourts also, I can’t eat all yogourts in this world anyway my selection is enough reduced, I feel always an enormous disgust by the yogourts more consistent, I can eat the yogourts more liquids. Sometimes, I use my time on trips for try new food at the restaurants or regional foods like during my trip at Ajaccio, Corsica this summer, I took the time to try Corsica food.
The smell of food is probably my new big progress and favorite part about the food. I could not eat some food in cause of my disgust so month after month, I learned something “smell food”, last year I could not eat food but I could not smell food equally in cause of my disgust about food. And today same if the food I can’t eat it in cause of my disgust or just because I don’t love it, I can smell it. I love when my mom cooks in the kitchen and smelling the odors of the food. I seriously love smell food. My favorites smell of this summer are the barbecues smells and candies & popcorn stalls in Europa Park or at the Fair.
HOW MUCH TIMES I EAT IN A DAY.
I can’t eat a lot of food in the same time, in real I eat very small portions by meal. I have always a little stomach but it does not bother me, I’m good about this. Like I have a very small stomach and I eat small portions by meal, I eat about 5 times by day, and it suits me better. I prefer to eat 5 times by day and small that big and 3 times by day. I feel better psychological about that and I read that it was better for the health of eating like that. I eat breakfast around 08h30 am, sometimes a snack at 10h30 am, lunch at 12h00 pm, a snack around 03h00 pm, sometimes crackers around 06h00 pm and dinner at 19h30 pm. Evidently, it’s depending of the day and on trips, I can eat differently but like I eat small portions that’s rest more or less the same rhythm.
I do not count anymore calories that I eat since many months already. My feelings about calories it’s: I eat food no matter how much calories are inside but generally I think (I do not write it) if I eat something with more calories inside in a meal. I could eat food who contain less of calories in the following meal or day… example: if I ate a big sundae in the afternoon, I could eat rather fruits in desserts on the evening. I don’t know exactly how much calories I consume, probably about 1400kcal/day but I can’t really tell as I do not count anymore and I do not look on the product label for see the number of calories inside the food. The way is good about calories.
WHAT FOOD I EAT.
My favorite food currently are strawberry, raspberry, rice, tagliatelle, chinese noodles, chocolate fondant, chocolate sundae, vanilla soft ice cream, gnocchi with cheese, mac and cheese, ny chessecake, croque monsieur, food with nutella, lemon/banana bread, corn dogs, mini sandwiches, chocolate viennois yogurt, cheese pizza, scramble eggs, french fries, chili con carne, chicken taï balls, pancakes, donuts, mint/vanilla milkshakes, nachos, s’mores, whipped cream, cupcakes, churros. These are my favorites food. I do not eat vegetables… it’s in my goals for this fall.
My eating way is really better.